Don't Vote. It Only Encourages Them

I used to care. I did.

I was a rabid ditto-head who planned my day around listening to Rush Limbaugh’s latest rants. I would argue trickle down economics with anyone who remotely seemed interested (and more than a few who didn’t). And then there was my little shrine to Reagan... jelly beans, candles and ammunition. Man, I sure did love Ronnie.

I believed in peace through superior firepower. Prosperity through deregulation. And better government through an informed populous.

Unfortunately, I was wrong.

At least about the last part anyway... Better governments and informed populations are both urban legends... like bigfoot, the alligator in the New York sewers and light beer that actually tastes like beer.

I haven’t voted in years, and I don’t plan on voting Tuesday.

And I don’t argue about politics, ever.

Every political argument , every political spinmaster’s pontification, every other freaking commercial on TV can be summed up in 14 words

“My lying sack of shit is better than your lying sack of shit....Nah!”

I can’t really put a finger on the exact moment I quit caring. I guess George the First’s Read My Lips moment lead me to the Lying Sack of Shit epiphany.

But Bill Clinton... Bill Clinton is the one that really did me in... I thought Clinton was one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse, I was convinced he was deep cover Soviet spy and his election would be the downfall of the capitalist system. In an ironic twist of fate, it took a Republican to do that.

Turns out Bill Clinton was just a bright redneck from the deep south with a good speaking voice and a weakness for plus size junior college dropouts.... What’s not to like about that?

I’ve tried over the years to figure out why people with more money than they know what to do with or really, really smart people who could make lots of money elsewhere spends so much time, energy and money running for political office.

I mean you’ve got to kiss a lot of ass just to get elected dog catcher, I don’t even want to think what you’ve got to kiss to get elected president.

Which lead to the formation of my first rule of politics:

“Anyone who desires political office and is willing to do what it takes to get elected is therefor, by definition, unfit for the job.”

So I don’t know who that leaves to run things, but whatever happens, you can’t blame me.

I didn’t vote for any of ‘em.